Sunday, November 23, 2008

Fun times together

Ice cream smile!

I'm about to go back to work again tomorrow. I've been off for 5 weeks due to an emergency surgery I may blog about another time...I'm not quite ready to do that yet.
But regardless I pulled my Cameron right out of daycare as soon as I was physically able to take care of him and me, and I had him stay home with me while I recovered fully. It's been an amazing time for me and for him and the rest of my family. I was able to start this blog, and another one with my recipies on it too! I also got into facebook, but more importantly I got to play and play and play with Cameron. Here are some things Cameron and I were up to:

Playing Swords, we did this for like two hours a day. Cameron has his mean face on. He gets two swords, I only get one.

Playing Marble Works and army guys, and this is some alien we found.

Boys hanging out and eating icecream

These are his "Guys" they played with us too!

Playing letter games

"No more pictures mom!"

He meant it.

Making Halloween Cookies

Here Cameron is "Johnny 5" He says "Input!, Input!"

Reading Endless Books

"Playing" Blokus

Building a Palace with our Blocks

I will miss our time together, it's sad, it's almost like I'm leaving, but I'm not going anywhere.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Find Your Voice, Declare who you are.

In order to influence anyone you must have a solid understanding of your beliefs.
You can then educate others and help improve their lives by making them challenge and question their own belief system and how they got there.
Missionaries do this for others. You can do this too. Our world is crumbling around us because people are being blinded to the real problems out there.
If you want to change things....if you want to educate anyone on any issue, political or religious, you have to speak up!
I'm talking specifically on politics and world events here, but it can apply to anything you feel strongly about.
But what if you don't know what you believe or how you feel? Do you shy away from politics because you don't know enough about any issue to argue or discuss it? Or did you decide to tell yourself that you "don't care about it"....and yet, truthfully, the reason you say this is because you really don't know anything about it.
Why stay ignorant? Ignorance is not bliss. Ignorance is shame. You don't feel good when you say I Dont Know. There is no shame in not knowing IF you then go find the answer. Find out about the issues and know what is happening in the world around you. You can then educate others who are as lost as you once were, then they will look up to you, they will respect you, then and only then can you influence people, you can help change things by challenging people's ignorance.... So many people let the media tell them how things are and how to feel, the media tells us who to believe in, who to trust, how to look, how to feel about others who don't look a certain way, they tell us who the crooks and hero's are, but if you look further , if you think'll find that most of the time....they are wrong, the media are wrong.
I too once wondered too where to start....I found out that;
First you must know what you feel and why, or you will not be effective. If you only know what you've been told and you don't know the other side, you know nothing. You don't know the facts. Did you research all sides for yourself and decide on your own? If you don't know how you really feel about an issue, you need to find out. You need to decide. You need to be that one voice, that person others look to for information. You need to be that voice for your children, they need to know where you stand, and how to stand up for what's right. They need to watch you challenge others and watch you share your beliefs. Then they will look to you for answers instead of the world.
You have to take the time to educate yourself or you will not be effective in expressing anything, you need facts, you need conviction.
Write down your own mission statement on your beliefs and why you believe them. This will make everything clear for you when things become cloudy again. Take the Obama test on the issues in my link list to the right. This test lists every possible political issue out there and you can decide how you feel on your own through your own research.
The best list I've found so far for finding who you are is from Glenn Beck below..., I have added to it; you may begin your quest for who you really are and what you really believe by doing the following:

FIND YOUR VOICE: You are your own voice. Others may be silenced. Who will lead if your guy 'who speaks for you' is gone?

FIND YOURSELF: Who are you really? What do you believe? Have you been pushed and challenged? Do you know where you stand? Can you support it with real facts?

FIND YOUR WEAKNESS: Don’t ignore your weakness. Make your weakness into your strength. Find out where your ignorance lies. What are you afraid of? What can you change for the better about yourself?

FIND YOUR VALUES: Make your list of values, model it after your religion's but add what you find important and take away what you dont. Don't feel how you're "supposed" to feel by anyone else's standards. These values are your focus, work at them. Values don’t just ‘happen’ they are developed. A house divided against itself cannot stand. Be the same person at home, at work, in public and private.

FIND YOUR LOVE: Too much hate has been planted. Uproot it, pull it out and find a way to replace it with goodwill and mutual respect for those of different faiths, political parties or viewpoints. Find those people, and build good meaningful relationships with them, don't be afraid of anyone because they believe differently than you do.

FIND YOUR FELLOW AMERICANS: Connect and encourage those who put Constitution and service to God first. Find those who love charity and help them do some good, then help them wake others.

FIND YOUR JOY: It will not come from places that the media has encouraged us to find it. True joy won’t be found in money, sex or power. You will need to know where your unlimited supply of joy can be found. Look to your family. Look at selfless service. But you have to find it for yourself.

Read this article for more inspiration:

Saturday, November 15, 2008


Our work in progress.....

The video above is of Kevin and our friend John hanging the drywall for our basement master bedroom. We had a carpet remnant installed just after this video, (which sat in the garage for six months after we bought it) and then Kevin and I moved in so we weren't cohabitating with our toddler. Now....A year and a half after we hung the drywall, we have finally decided what we want to do with these walls....(well, I knew I wanted pine or cedar tongue and groove, but at $12 a board, it was a little steep). So we found this awesome paneling that looks just like pine tongue and groove!
It's coming along great!

Kevin did the window wall in like an 2 hours, the rest went a lot faster!

Working on wall Four.....all walls done!

Now, when we clean up the mess, frame in the wondow, add doors to the closet and to the room itself, and then maybe buy furnature that is not a modge podge of stuff we've picked up here and there we'll show you the finished product!

Cameron, My Little Sunshine

My baby serenading me, singing , "You are my Sunshine." He knows how to make me melt.

I especially love that "Skies are 'Great"and "You neva know de-a"


Thursday, November 13, 2008

About me

ALL About Me!! - I got's a good intro though,

Name six behaviors habits that bother you in others
1. ingorance
2. judgementalism (?)
3. hypocrasy
4. violent behavior
5. being inconsiderate
6. laziness

Name six places you dream of vacationing
1) European Tour
2) Japan
3) Alaska
4) Boston
5) New York
6) Fall Follaige New England Tour

Name six favorite past times.
1. Movies at Theatres/ or at home snuggling with hubby
2. Going out to dinner then to most any Broadway show :)
3. Reading
4. Sleeping
5. Karaokeing
6. Cooking

Name six things you would like to accomplish in the next few years
1. Be able to cut back hours and spend more time with the kids
2. Get out of debt
3. Get a Regular workout schedule
4. Get closer to my friends
5. Go to Disneyworld with the boys
6. Take a cruise to Alaska with Kevin

Name six things people would be surprised to know about you...
1. I sing
2. I love being on stage
3. I am a large dog person
4. I love reading
5. I can nap the day away
6. I want to do foster care/ and adopt more kids/ and be a stay at home mom

Name six songs that describe your personality.
1. "I'm a Bitch" Meridith Brooks
2 "Torn" Natalie Imbruglia
3. "I will Survive" Gloria Gaynor
4. "Bring on the Rain" Jo Dee Messina
5. "The Song Remembers When" Trisha Yearwood
6. "Blessed" Martina McBride

What are 6 foods you can't live without (Specifics!!)
1. A Caramelo with a Reeses Peanutbutter Cup chaser
2. Diet Coke with Lime on ice w/ a bendy straw
3. Baked Potato with Butter and Sour Cream
4. Snelgroves Burnt Almond Fudge Ice Cream and Peppermint icecream with hot fudge, and lots of whipcream and almonds
5. Lays Origional Potato Chips, veggie tray, and my ranch dip
6. Don Jullio White Corn Chips/ Salsa/ Sour Cream and "Crappy" Cheese (Frito's Jalepenio Cheese in a can)

6 Favorite Animals

1. Great Dane
2. White Siberian Tiger
3. Giraffe
4. Golden Retreiver
5. Dolphin
6. Killer Whale

6 personality traits you love about yourself:
1. I'm a good friend, I am easy to talk to, I'm loyal, I'd do anything for a friend who needs me
2. My positive view on life. Almost everyone gets the benefit of the doubt.
3. I have many professional/ writing/ office/ get-er-done skills I'm proud of
4. I am VERY forgiving
5. I have a good body image. Relistic. But still good. I can name all my flaws, but am still okay with it, and they do not depress me.
6. The thing I love about the above is, when I was younger, I couldn't find one dang good thing about myself. Ever. I just grew out bad self esteem. And pretty recently too.

6 personality traits you hate about yourself:
1. I am a big time loner. so much so that I always want time by myself away from my adorable kids and hubby. (Secretly, I love my hour commute because of it)
2. I think other peoples kids are all annoying. (Other than my own of course) It sounds cruel, but true. Not everyone can LOVE kids. I never babysat as a teenager EVER because of it. I'm akward around them, and don't know how to handle disiplining when problems arise.
3. I'm WAY too independant. So much so that I shut out others. Including God.
4. I'm a little saucey, I like to flirt...still. I like to gamble -vegas style. I'm a closet bad girl on the inside.
5. I am a slob. My good body image causes me to not put in much of an effort. I'm really quite the slob in my husbands tee-shirts and my non-highlighted hair and no makeup. I hate girly stuff. Dresses, jewlery, I hate primping. Ah Well.

6 Things that made you fall in love and stay in love with your husband
1. We have amazing chemestry. Something that never happed to me before. Meeeeeeow. It was like palpable. Still Is.
2. He promised me he'd make me smile every day of my life. And he has.
3. He's a good listener. He's understanding, and patient with me
4. He puts up with my family
5. He doesn't care that I'm a slob. Doesn't mind my flaws one bit.
6. He's got amazing legs and butt. :)

6 moments in your life that you're most proud of:
1. The day I realized I'm not just a product of my family and their ways. But that I can decide who I want to be and become that person. No outside influence can stop me.
2. When I landed a job as an office manager for this company, like 2 months after I was hired as a lowly receptionist.
3. When I decided to have baby #2 - I let go of many, many fears that day.
4. I sang an accapella song / duet mix thing/ for this HUGE WSU Institue conference. Then my choir instructor asked us me sing it again later in class for the whole Ogden Institue Chorale, for the benefit of those who might have missed it the first time.
P.S. I did even better the second time.
5. When I decided it is okay to let some expectations go. Life is too short. I can give myself a break. And not feel guilty.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Nursery Rhyme's Evil Counterparts

I've always been slightly preoccupied by the levels of unnecessary violence in nursery rhymes. Witness!
1)Fractured skulls "Jack and Jill"
2)Stolen lambs' tails "Little Bo Peep"
3)Umm..more tail butchery "Three Blind Mice"
4)Bird-nose assault "Sing a Song of Sixpence"
5)Death by gluttony "Old Woman who swallowed a fly"
6)Child cruelty "Old woman who live in a shoe"
7)Spontaneous combustion "Pop goes the weasel"
8)Plague Death March "Ring around the Rosies" Of course a lot of these old rhymes have hidden meanings that have lost their sense over the years.

For instance:
"Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men, couldn't put Humpty together again." Which is widely accepted to refer to the destruction of a cannon during the English civil war. But here's the greater mystery, where's the line that explains, "oh, and Humpty's a giant, living egg?" It's not even as if the top of a wall is an especially likely place to find an egg. Or that one of the activities most closely associated with all the King's men is egg repair. So at what point did Humpty become an egg in the national psyche? And how? And had he not "had a great fall", what would he have hatched into?
And where did he procure his outlandishly large egg clothes?
And why would he want to dress like a human anyway? To win us over?
To blend in amongst us for some sinister purpose? I'm quite glad he fell.... Eggy menace.

Friday, October 24, 2008

The Bad, and the Ugly

Here's the gory stuff, that happened over the past year or so.... maybe it will make you feel better about your life. That's kind of morbid but, Well, I live to serve.....
I wrecked my Malibu a year ago last May, then wrecked my Lumina last month. I'm fine, thank goodness. Geez, it wasn't all my fault, but it is SO inconvenient and SO "unfair!" We had another car who's block cracked a summer ago, so we lost three cars this year. The good thing is two of the three cars and the one we currently have in working order were/are gifts. So the expense is really just convenience so we can deal with that just fine. But it's like....Again?!? REALLY?!?! Why do we have such bad luck with vehicles? Then I think, wait, we have GREAT luck with Vehicles, we keep getting them as gifts!

Kevin's and I are trying for Baby #3 (Girls scare me, but Kevin wants his "Princess" so I'll be happy either way) but so far I've had two miscarriages and then a real surprise...We didn't know it but I had one tubal pregnancy that didn't show up on our radar until it ruptured. Wow that was an adventure. I bled 3 units internally, I had to go into surgery before the docs could find what was actually one could see through all the blood on the scans, so my OBGYN had to open me up a 5 inch tall incision to find the problem. She found the ruptured tube and repaired everything, She was able to save both ovaries and one tube. I had a blood transfusion and here I am a week later walking around feeling alive and fabulous! I'm off work for 5 weeks, and the good part is, I really needed a break from work....and I really needed to shift my priorities. I really needed to spend this time with Cameron, It is so good for me.
These pregnancy losses are disappointing and scary to say the least but we're fine and not discouraged. We can try again in 5 months or we will!

Nathan had some struggles this year started when he got Mono last year and after 4 bouts of strep, he had his tonsils out last November. Then we got him a snowboard for Christmas and consequently hurt himself pretty bad in January. He took a wrong turn and my beginner ended up tumbling down a black diamond run, he had to be transported down the mountain strapped to a board by the emergency team at Snowbird...(Thanks so much you guys, you were amazing!) They were worried about a broken back/neck....he thankfully "just" ended up in a knee splint and shoulder splint for about 6 weeks. But that was hard for him. Then about 2 weeks later, the Mono came back. And this with the injury made school pretty difficult and he missed over 20 days of school in a term. This spiraled him into a pattern of anxiety, panic attacks, and depression. Because this kid aims to please and he was falling behind very fast....After much encouragement from us, counseling and some depression medication and a great summer AWAY from school, :) he's doing much better. Now that we're back in school, he's doing much better, this pic is Nathan's first day of 8th grade, and he sprained his wrist two days before school started!

Nathan's whole experience coupled with Cameron potty training, and in his Terrible 3's and needing endless attention. Kevin working and in school full time, me working full time and trying to be everything to everyone. It was hard to keep Nathan from feeling overwhelmed and guilty about needing so much of my help. I tried to keep him happy and positive and caught up on school work and keep the rest of the family happy too. It was hard on me. I had two close friends going though some bad stuff themselves and I wanted to give them a lot of my attention/counseling. After that...I was just too busy for anything else, so extended family, friends, hobbies, church etc got put on the back burner, and now I can't remember what I used to do when had time to do it.

Though I haven't finished paying off the tonsils, MRI's, three of my surgeries, a ambulance ride, counseling, & medications, the bills are hanging over my head, tapping me on the shoulder, I keep telling them, "I know, I know!" You'd think my company would garnish my wages since it's them I owe the money to.
Anyway, in May....
Cameron's babysitter whom we loved SO much had to suddenly stop doing daycare, so this was a big blow to us and to Cameron, we had to find someone else, but no one is a good as Michelle was to Cameron, we miss her! Just as an example, I would drop Cameron off at Michelle's and he couldn't WAIT to go to her house, I didn't have to give him a second thought when I was at work. This was because I was SO comfortable with her, and knew she would take great care of him, I know she loved him. Now that he's in a new place, I can't get Cameron off my mind while I'm at work.

Then....At the risk of sounding like I’m in third grade and crying while chasing after a moving van...... carrying away my best friend….My best friend Allison moved to Montana.
My other fabulous friend, Dan, moved to Arizona.

To be honest, it was hard for me to think of all the hard stuff.... I had to ask, "Honey, what crappy stuff happened to us in the last year and a half?"

I guess that's good, I don't really like to stay upset about stuff I can't change, it's not attractive. :)

But maybe you'll understand us a bit more, and feel reassured, like we have something in common. We're struggling too! Gas prices, food prices! Medical bills! Working our behinds off and feeling like we're not getting ahead....ick. But here's something I've learned....we will make it! Don't worry about stuff you can't change, and just move ahead, PLOW ahead. Don't get in debt, Do everything you can to prepare your home and family for emergencies. Don't look back, and don't panic. You'll be okay. We'll be okay!

Monday, October 13, 2008

The Good Stuff

Good things??
Kevin bought a 250cc Scooter, see above, this is Kevin driving and my brother Jeff on the back.... and we head out on this thing as often as we can and it's a blast.

Kevin's in school again for just one more year now, so I find myself with a little more time on my hands....hence the blogging.

I had an eye surgery...a lens implant. (a good thing! I can see 20-20 with no contact lens and I can't wait to do the next one!) for those of you who dont know I have/had no lenses in my eyes since they were removed when I was 12. So I'm legally blind with no contacts in, and I have no depth perception consequently. But now I can have the lenses implanted so I am experiencing the miracle of having eyesight 24/7. It's SO COOL! I will get the other eye done in November!

We got to visit Allison in Montana in May, our good friend John came to visit us in April and will be returning in October. I went to Nashville and stayed in this amazing hotel complex for almost a week with my Mom. (Much to the dismay of Kevin...sorry babe) Our good friend CJ is back in touch with us….well me mostly because guys don’t do phones well you know, and it’s nice to have him back though the casualty was his marriage and a never ending divorce and custody battle. Poor guy, and Poor Christopher, his son, caught in the middle. I hate divorce. But I’ve never supported one as whole-heartedly as I do this one. Tells you a little about the mom huh? As the late Bernie Mac used to say, “Nuff Said.”
I love my job, because it's challenging, and I'm needed. My boss is incredible and my team is there for each other.
Kevin and I are great too. We're happy, content to be together every second of the day, and a little sad we can't be all the time. That's a good thing for a marriage of 13.75 years. :)
Nathan's having a great year so far. He's doing well in school and his teachers and counselors are really good to him and good for him.
Cameron is FUN. And healthy, and potty trained and started preschool. He's going to be 4 on Saturday and I'm sad to see him grow up so fast. Each moment with him is filled with joy, wonder, and hilarity.
My mom bought us Lagoon passes so we've been enjoying the "free" entertainment. We're about out of debt....well, except the scooter and the mortgage worth of Student Loans looming over our heads. But that's okay, we'll tackle that next year :)
We're spending tons of time as a family and I've never been more content. How are you??

Thursday, October 9, 2008


K, You have to know something about me.... I am very involved in politics. I could care less about politicians per say, but I am very up on world events. I am in tune to the outside world. I never used to have a desire to be this person, this one "up on the issues" but I've learned a lot about the world around me and found that I used to buy into a lot of things that were not real. I didn't used to be this way, this one to argue about political issues, banter back and forth with my siblings about who's right who's delusional when it comes to political issues. I didn't used to even care. But someone taught me that being ignorant is no fun either.
I have to tell you about Glenn. He is a guy just like you and me. He could be my big brother, he is someone that I get. Someone who knows what I'm thinking and delivers every time with honesty and genuine innocent concern for the whole world, but even more so for his family. Glenn is an alcoholic (well, he hasn't had a drink in 9 years), but he was into drugs, had pride and egocentric tendencies and hurt people with his desire for fame and fortune. This was until he looked around one day and noticed that he had everything...and nothing. He was at the very end, suicidal, ready to leave this earth because of indescribable woe and frustration with his material world, his lack of purpose, his emptiness. But by the grace of God..."Saw the light" and changed. He found a good woman, and together they found our religious Faith, a faith that changed him and bought him purpose, direction, and real love. His purpose is exemplified by his new radio program and TV show. He is a grounded man. Faithful. He tells the truth, wants to find the truth, is a man of values, an independent. He will show you both sides and show you the way God looks at things. We need this in this time of unpredictability. He's Focused on a goal of brining us together, encouraging you to be a better person, he has a focused goal....though he'll tell you he's "riddled with ADD." His humor is refreshing. I admire him and what he has to say. He speaks to me, I feel like he gets me too. I'm aware that this is the plan, to get more listeners.....get them to connect with the host. But I am aware of those tactics, but still, there's just something about him.....
Get a taste of his honest brilliance, and you will be hooked.... while explaining our maddening economy crisis he can connect with you and show you the future, the consequences of our actions....Check him out. but better still, find him on the radio. He's the third most listened two radio program in the country.
See website links for "Economy crisis explained"

Friday, September 5, 2008

Things I've Done

To participate just copy and paste in your own blog, and put a star by or bold all of the things you have done. Happy discoveries! I learned that I've had a lot more experiences then I thought!

1. Started your own blog *
2. Slept under the stars *
3. Played in a band *
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower *
6. Given more than you can afford to charity *
7. Been to Disneyland *
8. Climbed a mountain *
9. Held a praying mantis *
10. Sang a solo *
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea *
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch *
15. Adopted a child (someday I will!)
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables *
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight *
22. Hitch hiked *
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort *
25. Held a lamb *
26. Gone skinny dipping *
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse *
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset *
31. Hit a home run *
32. Been on a cruise *
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person *
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community *
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied *
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing *
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke *
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt *
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant *
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight *
46. Been transported in an ambulance *
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing *
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain *
53. Played in the mud *
54. Gone to a drive-in theater *
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business *
58. Taken a martial arts class *
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen *
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies *
62. Gone whale watching *
63. Got flowers for no reason *
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma *
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp(well as close as you can get in the US I went to the museum in DC) *
67. Bounced a check *
68. Flown in a helicopter *
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy *
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial *
71. Eaten Caviar *
72. Pieced a quilt *
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone *
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle *
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person *
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car *
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper *
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House *
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating *
88. Had chickenpox *
89. Saved someone’s life *
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous *
92. Joined a book club *
93. Lost a loved one *
94. Had a baby *
95. Seen the Alamo in person *
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake *
97. Been involved in a law suit *
98. Owned a cell phone *
99. Been stung by a bee *

Saturday, May 31, 2008


Instead of blue, I want to desire yellow
I want a strength in my union, not weak indifference
There is day, dusk and dawn, only night is always looming.
Rain, Stars, all magic lilting over the earth a
Magic I cannot grasp. Ever, oh Ever
Seeking my solace, peace, my guardian angel
Where is my metaphor, the soul to capture and
Protect mine and all I desire to give them, be that
There are so many questions of loss, fill this void
A chance gone, of why hast thou, be that newness
Endless need, comforting predictability, meaning
Never-ending time spinning back to me again
Is life simply searching for perfection? Not God's,
Instead; acception, sought apathy, satisfactiory rest.
Is it the sence of peace, knowing the day will be yours
Not a one owning your time, encompasing your sences
Insead I posess where I give the last drop of self
Instead It is all taken